Standing on the terrace.
Billie’s singing
Bury a friend.
And I am thinking
No.
There is hope.
Prevent sinking
Hold a rope.
You’ll realise
You miss me,
Like in the movies,
“Indefinitely,”
Julia says.
You’ll drive to me,
Crazy, through town,
In spite of
The world locking down.
Come to where I stand
And hold me like you do –
Did –
And say, “surprise!
“I’ve been down
“You’ve been down
“But now, let’s rise, SF,
“Surprise.”
I welcomed you into my life,
When I was whole and strong;
I disclosed all of my strife;
You vowed you would belong.
You were privy to each moment;
All my loved ones knew you:
For I fought to make it just so:
How else could we be true?
But I have never known your home,
For you had no real say,
I have walked around your life –
In mine, I built your way.
After you’ve left, door ajar,
Drawers empty, faith torn,
You did not leave just me, my love,
You left a family forlorn.
Each wound I laid down before you,
Back when you wanted me;
You slept, baked, loved, lived, in these walls,
They probe now, seeking clarity.
Everyone I brought to you,
Now question, grieve and rage –
With each talk, I relive your loss –
It cannot fade, for it does not age.
Your life has none who know me,
Not even the lone sibling,
Whose time I chose to ask for,
Whose voice you sought to bring…
No one speaks for me, before you;
But I speak with many each day;
They cry, when I cry, having known you;
Each wish to have their say.
I gave you what you did not have,
I gave you them, I gave you me,
Perhaps you never thought it so
And caged me, thinking yourself free.
A virus ravages the world.
A famine envelops mine.
I crawl into bed,
Having no measure of time,
Sleep eludes me for days,
As your memory ravages my mind.
I lift up the pillow you used
And hold it to my face.
Your smell has followed you away.
I remember,
If you remember how I would,
Or if you undoubtedly felt
When you said,
I don’t want to be with you.
Hearts Still Care 
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