lockdown – Hearts Still Care

The lockdown ended. I have healed in body. I rejoined the gym. I got done with my double vaccination. I wanted to go for a movie in the theatre. So my partner, sister and I went for Eternals at INOX, Malad. I was excited to see Angelina Jolie play an immortal. She being as old as I, I wished to see how we compare. Delusions of grandeur, but they are what they are, then.

It was at the back of my mind that I had not gone for a movie since February, 2020, when my family was full and I had not lost two people I love. Shubh Mangal Zyada Savdhan had been the last movie I saw in the theatres before the virus attack and the crescendo of chaos that followed.

We went to the same theatre. The mood was not truly festive, though I tried making it so with selfies and snapchat. The mall was lovely. The theatre within, grand. I forgot though how I had felt after my losses. The moment you remember past experience at a certain spot: a selfie there, a touch there, a hug there, holding hands in the theatre and sharing popcorn.

The seats were the same but there were alternate placements. We were separated by a seat on either side. The experience was not the same. Loss glared and memories churned. The movie –

Eternals is a brilliant movie. It is different from the scale and brightness of the Avengers, but it, too, resumes after loss, after the deaths of heroes we shared a decade with. It begins with the creation of all being, it transports us through time, intermittently with the present. It is not confusing, the time leaps or flashbacks are placed more to prevent confusion. It is not like the earlier marvel films, it is more adult, and more inclusive.

And let’s just get this out of the way, the reason for it being banned, please, nonsensical. One of the superheroes is gay, has a lover and a child and shares one same-sex kiss. If people still have a problem with this, in this day and age, then it truly is their problem.

Moving on, the film is more mature, despite all the naysayers, it is. I mean, we are talking about dazzlingly handsome gods with hammers flying around in other Marvel movies. Here, we see the Eternals being given the task of protecting humanity from the Deviants. They have been appointed this task by the Celestials, “superior” immortals. They are not supposed to interfere in events that humanity itself creates, or the wars and destruction humanity also creates. That is the long and short of it.

So now, I imagine the High Elves of Middle-earth, who were appointed to the task to guide the second children of Eru, Men. Being immortal, one has to face the weariness of life and the sheer stupidity of humanity. But also immortality makes one understand that humanity is capable of greater things. More importantly, being immortal, one begins to take on human emotion. When one recognizes love and its vessel, the vessel itself needs to be protected.. That is what the crux of the film actually is. It may be maudlin. It may be a bit of a cliché, but it is what it is.

Chloé Zhao succeeds in bringing this to the forefront. People who don’t want to appreciate what the film is trying to convey, will not, and it is alright. The director has done well with creating a superhero movie. It is not bad, like the Superman vs Batman movie, it is not as good as the first Wonder Woman, but it makes for good fare. It brings up issues like the horror human beings have in their hearts to commit, the weight of living life as an immortal and the idea of love that can be understood even by those who are not human.

For me, Angelina Jolie stands out as goddess of war, Thena, and Gemma Chan has done a fair job as the gentle Sersi. Salma Hayek. as the motherly Ajak, completes the main female trinity. The film has well-crafted action scenes. Angelina is made for roles like these, by the way.

The movie had two scenes which touched me. One where Barry Keoghan as Druig confronts Ajak and tells her that he cannot remain an idle bystander while human beings commit atrocities on one another. Two, where Thena speaks to Sersi and talks to her about why humanity needs to be protected. The themes are simple and they are treated simplistically. These are gods who can do something about something and they do it. Simple.

I went there to watch Angelina and I ended up liking the movie. In the last Avengers movie, I went to see – I don’t even remember who I went to see. I probably will see this movie again though. It made me think about the love I have lost and the love I have gained. It reminded me that life is shit and our purpose here is to try and stop it being shitty. I left the theatre not feeing cheated of the seven hundred bucks I paid to watch the movie, and scenes from the movie remain with me hours later.

Sitting at the computer, after completing a shit ton of work, I turned to my dog who had yawned. He looked at me sleepily. I wondered how life is for him. At the moment, because of the lockdown, there is no life. He is confined in these walls just as I am. But I have other things to keep me company. I have my television, my computer, my books, my blogs, my art, my camera, my phone and social media. What does he have? Me.

He has always had just me. So, I really look at him. I gave him a hug. I want him to know that I am sorry that I had not paid him enough attention. Even now, as I write this, I am not giving him attention. He is right at my feet. Dozing off again.

This is generally the life we lead. A life where we strive to earn money, where we try to look our best for people online who we will never really ever meet. Family will pass by, and we will see our pictures together with a sense of nostalgia. Carpe Diem, is something that is just taught to us in literature. I try very hard to live each day as it comes… but I never really manage to live up to its full potential. Or mine, for that matter.

However, this is not a post about dejection and lost chances. Even locked in my home, for nearly a month, won’t really make me bored. I have plenty of things to do. How do I make this worthwhile for my kiddos though? There are many websites that will tell me stuff to do with them. Maybe, all I need to do is spend some time with them. I guess that is generally what everyone wants, isn’t it?

I want people I love to spend time with me. I want them to notice me and give me a hug. I want to hear about their feelings. But I also don’t want to get into an argument – which is always a danger with human beings. I would like people to be kinder. Hell, it doesn’t have to be some stranger – just give someone you love a compliment. Tell them that you would like to be in their company. Give them a smile.

Covid-19 has struck at the heart of humanity. It’s literally taken life’s breath. We are social animals. We want to be with other people. Mix around and talk and share thoughts. We can still share thoughts, but physical distancing is so heart breaking. Not to a haphephobic, of course, but hey, you get what I am trying to say. That being said, who else is to blame for this catastrophe but us?

Look at what we have done to the world we live in. We have taken it from granted. So the world has decided to encapsulate us into our own homes. Just thinking about a polar bear, on a broken piece of ice, stranded in the middle of an ocean, makes me want to yell. Yell out at the people who don’t pay enough attention to this tragedy. Most people I know would not be able to relate. It’s just a glacier breaking into the sea. It’s just another forest fire. It’s just another virus. They think that it’ll all pass without serious repercussions.

Maybe that is true when one thinks of the world in an existential dynamic. It’s just been a couple of weeks of human beings staying put and the world is beginning to breathe. There are wild animals walking about unafraid. The wind is cleaner. The stars brighter. The world will go on. Of course, it will. With or without humanity still in the dynamic, that is a whole different argument. But seriously though: how hard is it to stop using plastic? To conserve water? To use a dustbin? To feed a stray animal? To get out of your fucking cocoon of self-importance?

But enough of this lecture. I believe that if someone is worried about the way things are, he will make the call to do something about it himself. Nothing anyone can say or do can make people, who do not want to listen, listen. So I am going to shut up and go and sit with my doggo who deserves my attention.