Your Calling

He meant nothing to me –

Except he was your father

Who turned you away

For being gay.

You did all you could

And I know you would;

Because that’s who you are.

Suffering teaches you

The value of death.

Seeing you do,

What needs to be done,

Breaking a pot,

Taking turns around the fire,

Lifting the water

And the clarified butter,

Like the body of your father,

Like I had done a few years ago,

Made me weep.

Abscesses linger

Of abandonment.

Wounds that have cut too deep

Don’t allow the momentum

Of life to fall back into joy.

You will leave by morning,

For duty, a calling

And a new suffering,

Time has chosen to employ.

Smile

A smile may hide
Secrets of pain –
Of love so deep
But lost in vain.

A smile may show
What all can see –
Yet few must know
What it must be.

A smile may lie,
In dying dreams;
A smile may not be
All that it seems.

Surprise

Standing on the terrace.
Billie’s singing
Bury a friend.
And I am thinking
No.
There is hope.
Prevent sinking
Hold a rope.

You’ll realise
You miss me,
Like in the movies,
“Indefinitely,”
Julia says.

You’ll drive to me,
Crazy, through town,
In spite of
The world locking down.
Come to where I stand
And hold me like you do –
Did –
And say, “surprise!
“I’ve been down
“You’ve been down
“But now, let’s rise, SF,
“Surprise.”