Christmas 2020

I will place the Laurel wreath,
I will put up the green tree,
I will laugh with concerned friends,
And that’s just what you will see.

The tears I shed for us,
At each breaking of dawn,
Won’t be placed in the crib,
You bought from Bandra town.

The wrenching of my heart
Succumbing to sorrow
Will not be baked in cakes
I order tomorrow.

There will be the advent,
There’ll be carols and cheer;
But all will be aware
You chose not to be here.

There will be frost and ice;
At home, all that is nice;
But, in my heart and head,
I’m crucified instead.

Boo

Every time I think I am getting over
you,
A friend comes home
And says,
”You’re better off, boo”;
Or
an underwear
You
left
behind,
Sneaks out of our drawer,
And fucks with my mind;
Or
I see some guy
Walking down the street…
And I am reminded
of your
Hair,
or eyes,
or gait,
or feet –
And, no matter what therapy I have gainfully employed,
You
descend on my heart,
And I find it
destroyed.

Last Things

Bottles of medicines –
Empty now and lying there –
The last of your shampoo
I used on my hair.

The black comb
You forgot to take –
The socks in the drawer –
Careless mistakes –

The pop socket broke –
We bought it, us three –
These little, last things
You won’t ever see.

I hold on to them
Like pieces of a heart,
And wonder when
The moving on shall start.