When ever you saw a cockroach
you’d scream.
I’d compel you and tease you and
You’d run –
Now, you just remain in parts of
My dreams
You have taken the parts of me
That were fun.
Today, I saw a cockroach and
I smiled;
It reminded me of us for a
little while.
Every night as I sleep near you,
Your back is turned to me;
And through this journey of my pain –
Your back is all I see.
It’s like a time worn barricade
Of distance and no relief,
Quietly, in the dark, I type
And deal alone with grief.
Somewhere in your heart, you must know:
I’ve no one left but you;
But each night, a turning-away
Is all I get from you.
I survived a drunk father
Who tried to beat me to his will;
School bullies tried to knock me down;
But life found me standing still.
I wondered at my difference then –
But I knew it couldn’t be a flaw;
If I was honest with myself,
Who cares what another saw?
I saw the death of those I loved;
Life tried to crush hope from me;
I stared death twice in the eye;
So she smiled and let me be.
Still she had her due and
Yet she takes; but I know now:
While life rests in my heart,
She’ll stay content on my brow.
So I give in to life each time
And i let love love him so;
And death reaches in deep
When he watches love go.
I survive the parting.
I digest all of the pain.
But I know I am human;
And it’ll happen again.
So, as the sadness envelops,
Every fibre of my being,
I know I still survive, for
It’s in me I’m believing.
Hearts Still Care 
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