Alone

I looked at you,
Over an aching heart –
The disgust in you
Gave despair a start.

All I wanted
Was made too clear:
Strong security
And freedom from fear.

Though I know all men
Are much the same:
I played this old game
That has a new name.

I walk the night again,
It will help me cope,
With a cold future,
That freezes my hope.

Your touch has lost warmth,
My eyes aren’t as bright;
You get more than you ask
And I have no will to fight.

I am alone again,
I make love alone;
It is alone I smile,
All alone I moan.

Intimacy was lust
They blurred in the start,
I must explain this
To this fallen heart.

Crocodile

I’m afraid of love now.
It lurks like a crocodile underwater,
Waiting for me to fall in,
Its jaws waiting to slaughter.

It’s a hunger I share;
Though, it’s swimming with fear.
It hopes I am hungry enough;
It swims precariously near.

The reptilian eyes gleam,
Golden above the surface;
Its body, lithe and ages old,
Harbours no remorse, no disgrace.

The hunger gnaws at my sides;
The water is cool, calm, blue;
And as I slice in, I realise
I am a crocodile, too.

Spaces

There are spaces, like the dark between stars,
That reach out, in my hope, to consume me.
These are not just vacuums of nothingness;
But rooms of mythical infinity.

Each space never becomes a sun,
That could have its own heavenly spheres;
Because I make love in borrowed light, formed
From rejection, dejection and tears.