Goodie Pua

I couldn’t dress you,

The way you wanted to shine.

I couldn’t touch you,

I couldn’t do your hair up fine.

We spoke of death and love,

Before you were taken away,

I really did all I could;

But oxygen blew you away.

You were my only Father!

Of all in the family, beloved you!

You’re left now, with all the rest,

My home, my childhood, my truth.

My Secretive Mind

I saw you, day before,
Moving on, on some dating app;
You looked good; I smiled;
I didn’t fall into some anxious trap.

After ten months, I thought,
I have begun to let go –
But now I fear my mind
Keeps secrets it doesn’t show.

I know now that nothing
Was what seemed about you;
And yet, last night, as I slept,
I dreamed about you.

Christmas 2020

I will place the Laurel wreath,
I will put up the green tree,
I will laugh with concerned friends,
And that’s just what you will see.

The tears I shed for us,
At each breaking of dawn,
Won’t be placed in the crib,
You bought from Bandra town.

The wrenching of my heart
Succumbing to sorrow
Will not be baked in cakes
I order tomorrow.

There will be the advent,
There’ll be carols and cheer;
But all will be aware
You chose not to be here.

There will be frost and ice;
At home, all that is nice;
But, in my heart and head,
I’m crucified instead.