The decade of 1997-2007 was a lovely one. Predominantly, because two of my favourite fantasy book series came into dazzling light. The Lord of the Rings that I had loved since childhood became the spectacular movie trilogy and the Harry Potter series breathed life into the fantasy genre and brought a whole generation back to reading. They took the world by storm.
As I read the series, with intermittent gaps of years at a time, every book release became a phenomenon. There were two characters that I adored and fell in love with. Hermione Granger and Albus Dumbledore. I am gay and was considered a bookworm by all of my peers. Two things that didn’t sit well with them and so my schooling years were filled with – you can guess it. So these two characters seemed to call out to all of those insecurities and experiences.
Hermione, being who she was, got accepted within the first year itself…and her angst was related more to being a regular teen girl whose feelings were misunderstood often by the men she loved. So over the progression of the books, Dumbledore became a favourite. In The Order of the Phoenix, he rejects capture and disappears with Fawkes. “Dumbledore’s got style,” says Shacklebolt.
I smiled. I knew then that this wonderful man was gay. By the last book, it all became quite clear what Grindelwald and he shared was not just “bromance”. They had been lovers. The character took on added significance as he was not all light and twinkles. His character became human, rife with flaws and mistakes. It spoke of the promise of betterment.
In the movies, Richard Harris didn’t quite sit well with me as Dumbledore. No offence to any fans of Harris out there, but that is just my personal opinion. He was too classy, and too proper for Albus Dumbledore whom I always pictured as quirky but brilliant. So when Michael Gambon stepped into Albus Dumbledore’s shoes, I was overwhelmed. He was brought in, what also happened to be my favourite book of the series, The Prisoner of Azkaban, which also happened to be directed by one of my favourite directors, Alfonso Cuarón.
Michael Gambon brought to Albus Dumbledore’s character all that it was missing. The beaded beard, the lopsided hat, the flowing robes, the wink in the eye and the absent-minded whimsicality of the principal I had become so very fond of. It is no great surprise then that apart from Harry, Hermione, Ron, Luna – he was the only other adult character from the Potter series that I chose to sketch. It also became a seminal work because I finished it, when I lay awake during the terror attacks on my city that lasted for three whole nights.
It stands as a testimony to the sacrifices of those many who were and are innocent in the schematics of world politics and blind faith. Dumbledore stands as that man who believed in something and who loved, and then had his beliefs corrected and resurrected. He loved once and loved wholly. He never killed Grindelwald in the epic battle that we shall never see on the big screen or read about other than a few lines in passing in the series. But I understand what the character himself must have gone through. Because cataclysmic heartbreaks with a revolution in faith form a hard road to walk upon.
I am not surprised he had all the three Deathly Hallows in his possession and never used them – he just passed them on. Willingly. He lived a life, which may not necessarily have been complete or even satisfactory – but he made his peace with it and more is to the point, he lived it with a new purpose. And when it was time to let it all go, he did so, on his own terms. Just such a brilliant example to learn from.
Hearts Still Care 
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