Unhappy

There is this part of me,

A responsibility,

I feel it every day,

Scraping my insides,

I have reasoned with it,

Telling it to grow up,

Be strong and face life

And its reality.

I have bargained with it,

Giving it compassion,

Clothes and food,

Even a daily hug;

But it wants more.

I cannot give this thing

A loving glance,

It has remained the same,

I’ve outgrown this dance.

It asks me at daybreak,

If I still feel passion;

But time has changed me,

In every physical fashion.

It seeks to feel what I gave,

A long time ago,

I choose to bestow a hug

And nothing more.

It asks me at noon,

If I remember it at work,

And I want to yell

“How can I forget your fucking nails?”

It asks me at twilight,

If the sun is as gold

As the time we danced,

I look at the gold and think

How many more years

Before it burns out.

Perhaps if I ignore the thing,

Its own need will eat it alive.

I’ll prevent a rescue,

Even if it is from me –

Perhaps sadness will do the deed

For it can never be happy.

To my mother

If there is a God and he lived here on earth
he must be the one who gave me birth
he is the one who raised me through time
he is the reason and he is the sign
he took care of me when i was in pain
he remained awake and made no complain
he accepted me as i happened to grow
i quietly reaped as he managed to sow
my love knows no definition
with this god of mine
we share a unique rendition
of this music through time
so you, dear woman, are god as i see
you are my mother, you are he.

To A-

in all the pages time has written in my life
i find no need to alter even a word
i’ve learnt to make my peace with strife
because my prayers have been duly heard

the smiles i asked for may not be the same
as i had intended them to be
but in a healthy measure they quietly came
bringing you just as quietly to me

love in novels is all very fine
but the love time has brought to me
is the one that transcends time
even while living in quiet reality.