A Few Days Before

It’s a breathlessness
That’s engulfing
A sleeplessness
That’s terrifying.
A sense of loss that’s worse than
Bereavement –
Because I know you are alive
But I can’t get to you.

You can’t say I have
Not made you smile
With love,
Hugged you hard, when you were sad.
Even if I caused you to cry,
When I felt bereft.

I am falling in a limbo
And
I am blind
because I love you,
And
all I feel is pain
Because you aren’t here to love me back.

You say I won’t keep you happy
But a few days before
You wanted me
A few days before you missed me
So much
You felt a breathlessness
That’s terrifying.

A few days before you loved me.

Battlefield

I wrote about it to last me for years;
But it seems like time has stood very still.
It has cost me sanity drowned in tears,
And yet feeds, for it has not had its fill.
I haven’t been able to learn much from time;
In all, but pain, I have grown carelessly:
Like a teen, I still want what is called mine,
Like a sage, I still give in helplessly.

I wrote about it from blood of the heart;
There needs be some worthy credit to thought.
I wrote, I write, I writhe. It won’t depart
This wretched battle so very hard fought…
Every word here, ultimately, dies,
Before lighting any spark in your eyes.

Blood and water

A lover once said:
Blood was thicker than water.
He proved it.
International normalised ratio
Indicates coagulation.
Radioactive equivalent water thickness
Indicates purity.
But purity of blood
Sometimes
Causes an uproar.
Pure bloods are incorrect.
Still lovers leave.
Blood is thicker than water.
It begs the question then:
When thirst beckons
Why is water chosen?
Drink blood, lover.