49

I have lived and I have loved;
I have laughed and I have cried;
I have grown through the fast years,
And mourned them all, as they died.

Hope has always been a friend
And love has been my queer guide;
I believed them to be true –
Yet, all this time they have lied.

It’s hard to trust the flowers;
It’s hard to forget the past;
Though I know no matter what
No flower will ever last.

I carry my wounds around,
All are quite welcome to see
How they ooze and seldom heal
This heart, beating, inside of me.

But, I am surrounded by those,
Who cannot feel and do not see;
So I find myself asking lovers,
If they have ever truly loved me.

Sleep

Sleep lets you know
What death feels like,
When you get into bed,
And those you love
Don’t know you’re alive.
It is death.
It shows you
The nightmare
Of being alone.
Even in life.

I

I am told the world lies,
None mean what they say;
And, if, perhaps, they do,
The truth changes, every day.

The love they speak of fades;
The vows they make all break;
The hope they give tarnishes;
Yet, it all was never meant to be… fake.

And I wish I could deceive
The ones I love and hate;
I wish I could erase promises,
Like cleaning chalk from slate.

But I can’t. I mean every word.
I can’t bother to deal in lies.
My truth is all I have living,
Without it, this character dies.