The journey with this performance began almost two years ago, when I first rehearsed and performed this song properly at my 49th birthday party. It became, in many ways, a tie-in to two extraordinary actresses of the 50s and 60s — Madhubala and Meena Kumari.

Since childhood, I have been emulating such iconic women. Growing up as a femme boy, it was difficult for me to model myself after men, especially given the lack of worthy male figures in my life. Instead, I was drawn to strong women — their magnetism, their aura, their power. Watching them on screen felt natural, and I found myself dancing to songs from Bollywood, long before I understood what it all meant. Film, song, and dance were always welcome in our home — though, of course, the “men” disapproved. Kathak became my artistic release, my stage of truth, and I performed for many years.

Later, when I entered the gay community, I realised quite young — at around 16 or 17 — that gender fluidity must always be welcome. I am glad to be living in an age now where Gen Z has embraced this with ease, not stigmatised it as my generation often did. I identify as a cis male gay man, but I am more than happy to allow my femme side to breathe. I love the alta, the dupatta, the grace of an anarkali draped just so. It is not drag in the traditional sense — it is fluid, playful, freeing.

So, for the Gay Bombay Talent Show on 21st September, I chose to honour both Madhubala and Meena Kumari through their iconic songs — Pyaar Kiya Toh Darna Kya and Thade Rahiyo. Initially, I went back and forth between Inhi Logo Ne and Thade Rahiyo, but my heart leaned towards Meena Kumari ji’s sheer elegance in the second. 

I even designed costumes for each piece. For Pyaar Kiya Toh Darna Kya, I sourced nearly 16 metres of fabric with heavy work along the hem. It looked magnificent but proved impossible to manage during the pure Kathak sequence of the first two minutes — the skirt was simply too heavy. That’s when I decided to let it be the costume for Thade Rahiyo, and I’m glad I did. As you can see it in the pictures. 

Everything came together so beautifully. I recreated the film sequence on stage, with my “muh-boli bahen” Christina as Gauhar Jaan and my friends stepping into the roles of Nawabs. We rehearsed at a cosy space called Little House in Yari Road, about four times, before taking it to stage. Everyone came dressed in white, with touches of red and pink to reflect the Nawabi splendour, and Christina stunned in a brand-new sharara.

When the performance began, some in the audience were unfamiliar with the song. At one point, when a Nawab “stormed off” as part of the act, people genuinely thought he was leaving in anger — only to realise it was woven into the choreography. With gunshots, bi-plays, and grandeur, it unfolded like living cinema. Under the stage lighting, it looked epic.

The pictures capture only glimpses — the costume, the styling, the mood — but the full video (which I’ll share once edited) tells the story. It was seamless, majestic, and made possible by my incredible co-performers: Christina, Savio, Ankush, Vishal, Saif, Gary, Urzaan, and Abhinav.

I’m exhausted, yes, but also deeply fulfilled. The entire talent show was a triumph — spectacular performances all around — and being on stage again felt brilliant. This is just the beginning. I think I shall keep doing this.