It’s a darkness I touch every day
It comes from having lost so much
It comes from bitter experience
Seeking abstractions I cannot touch

It’s a hope that is out of reach
No matter what I do, feel or teach
I cannot trust the positive trope
Though trust is what would help me cope.

It’s seeing a possible future
I know may still not come to pass
Of not knowing the diamond I have
Is not just another piece of glass.

It’s being breathless and bereft
Certainty of death is all that’s left
And it’s not really helpful to see
That no one else can help me but me.